Thing is, at these kinds of velocities, the hardness of the materials don't matter. Even hardened RHA steel has different properties when meeting a hypervelocity object. Overall think of it like the pressure created at the contact point of the slug and armor steel exceeds its yield strength.
But it's true that the diameter of the copper liner matters. A small roadside efp mine which takes out a humvee won't be able to disable a mbt. A large enough efp mine would be eventually be able to disable a mbt class target, but at that point it might be too large to conceal or too cumbersome. A better trick is to fire the slug from top, where the armor in thinner.
Bill 2 ATGM with overfly-top-attack warhead.
TOW 2B heavy ATGM
Technically EFPs are a subset of the shaped charge or HEAT mechanism. Same copper plate will form a jet of metal instead of a solid slug if it's made more conical on the concave side.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shaped_charge