Jokes Thread

[anoop_mig25]

 

[anoop_mig25]

 

[anoop_mig25]

 

[anoop_mig25]

 

[anoop_mig25]

 

[anoop_mig25]

 

[anoop_mig25]

 

[AVERAGE INDIAN]

 

[Kunal Biswas]

 

[W.G.Ewald]

Not from The Onion:

Obama Denies Role in Government : The New Yorker

President Obama used his weekly radio address on Saturday to reassure the American people that he has "played no role whatsoever" in the U.S. government over the past four years.

"Right now, many of you are angry at the government, and no one is angrier than I am," he said. "Quite frankly, I am glad that I have had no involvement in such an organization."

The President's outrage only increased, he said, when he "recently became aware of a part of that government called the Department of Justice."

"The more I learn about the activities of these individuals, the more certain I am that I would not want to be associated with them," he said. "They sound like bad news."

Mr. Obama closed his address by indicating that beginning next week he would enforce what he called a "zero tolerance policy on governing."

"If I find that any members of my Administration have had any intimate knowledge of, or involvement in, the workings of the United States government, they will be dealt with accordingly," he said.

 

[Raj30]

newslaundry "@newslaundry 19 May
A political menagerie,Rahul Baba, Sunetra Chowdhury, ABP news & friends from across the border. Here's Clothesline 6 Clothesline Episode 6 | Newslaundry "¦
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sunetra choudhury " @sunetrac 7h
@newslaundry for the love of god,at least get the spelling of my name right! I guess you guys should know good journalism lies in details
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sharmarohitraj "@sharmarohitraj 6h @sunetrac You mean NDTV is bad journalism too ) look at the pic and devil in detail. @newslaundry @madhutrehan pic.twitter.com/4JpLsDdep2

SR "@qinnairen 6h
@sharmarohitraj Superb catch bro. Expect a great rebuttal from the good journalists like @sunetrac CC: @newslaundry @madhutrehan

 

[Ray]

More English lessons

We are all familiar with
a Herd of cows,
a Flock of chickens,
a School of fish
a Gaggle of geese.

However, less widely known is:
a Pride of lions,
a Murder of crows as well as their cousins the rooks and ravens
an Exaltation of doves
and, presumably because they look so wise:
a Congress of owls.
Now consider a group of Baboons.
They are the loudest, most dangerous, most obnoxious, most viciously aggressive and least intelligent of all primates.
And what is the proper collective noun for a group of baboons?

?

?

Believe it or not "¦"¦. a Parliament
A PARLIAMENT OF BABOONS!
I guess that pretty much explains the things that come out of Parliament!
You just can't make this stuff up.

 

[Ash]

Life ends when you stop dreaming...
Hope ends when you stop believing...
Love ends when you stop caring... and
Friendship ends when you stop sharing!


A Indian farmer walking through his field notices a foreigner using one hand to scoop and drink water from an unclean pond.

The farmer shouts, "Arre baba, woh paani mat peena. Usme gayein or suwar sandas karte hai har roz!" (Oh dear, don't drink that water. Cows, pigs & cattle pee and s#*t in it daily)

The foreigner shouts back,
"I'm a foreigner; I don't understand your bloody gibberish language. Speak English, you bloody Indian idiot!"

The Indian farmer shouts back in English, "Use two hands, you can drink more!" your mad%r ch@d

 

[Kunal Biswas]

weird but funny ..

 

[AVERAGE INDIAN]

 

[Raj30]

 

[Raj30]

 

[Raj30]

 

[Raj30]

 

[VIP]