Jokes Thread
- Thread starter Daredevil
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*ADDRESS OF GOD, BHAGWAN, ALLAH ...... !!!!*
Ek fakir bheek maangne ke liye mandir ke baahar baitha tha ...
Sab bhakt aankh bacha kar chale gaye ...
usey kuch na mila ...
woh phir church gaya ,
aur phir gurudware ...
phir masjid
lekin usko kissi ne kuch na diya ...
Aakhir ek maikhane (BAR / PUB) ke bahar aakar baith gaya ...
Jo sharabi nikalta, Wo uske katorey mein kuch daal deta ...
Uska katora noton se bhar gaya ... faqir bola,
" hey Bhagwan... !!
Rahtey kahaan ho, aur address kahaan ka dete ho...."
Ek fakir bheek maangne ke liye mandir ke baahar baitha tha ...
Sab bhakt aankh bacha kar chale gaye ...
usey kuch na mila ...
woh phir church gaya ,
aur phir gurudware ...
phir masjid
lekin usko kissi ne kuch na diya ...
Aakhir ek maikhane (BAR / PUB) ke bahar aakar baith gaya ...
Jo sharabi nikalta, Wo uske katorey mein kuch daal deta ...
Uska katora noton se bhar gaya ... faqir bola,
" hey Bhagwan... !!
Rahtey kahaan ho, aur address kahaan ka dete ho...."
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- Joined
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- Joined
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bhramos
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There is a classroom of some small children (5-7yrs),
with a genius boy ( Bablu ) and a smart one (Pappu).
The dialogue between the two and the teacher goes something like this:
Bablu: "Teacher, teacher! Is Bus male or female?
Teacher : Thinking.......
Pappu: "Teacher, teacher! It is female"
Bablu : "Kyon?"
Pappu: "Kyon ki sab log uspe chadte hain."
Teacher is pareshan. While Bablu gets in doubt.
Bablu: "Agar bus female hai aur sab uspe chadte hain to uske bacche kyon nahin hote?"
Teacher is more pareshan.
Pappu: "Kyon ki sab us par peeche se chadte hain."
Teacher is now hiding her face.Bablu gets another doubt.
Bablu: "Maana sabhi peeche se chadte hain, but driver aur conductor to aagay se chadte hain. Phir bachche kyon nahin hote?"
Teacher is sweating as it is getting too much to handle.
Pappu replies : "Kyon ki woh dono topi pehanke chadte hain."
Teacher faints !!!!!!!
with a genius boy ( Bablu ) and a smart one (Pappu).
The dialogue between the two and the teacher goes something like this:
Bablu: "Teacher, teacher! Is Bus male or female?
Teacher : Thinking.......
Pappu: "Teacher, teacher! It is female"
Bablu : "Kyon?"
Pappu: "Kyon ki sab log uspe chadte hain."
Teacher is pareshan. While Bablu gets in doubt.
Bablu: "Agar bus female hai aur sab uspe chadte hain to uske bacche kyon nahin hote?"
Teacher is more pareshan.
Pappu: "Kyon ki sab us par peeche se chadte hain."
Teacher is now hiding her face.Bablu gets another doubt.
Bablu: "Maana sabhi peeche se chadte hain, but driver aur conductor to aagay se chadte hain. Phir bachche kyon nahin hote?"
Teacher is sweating as it is getting too much to handle.
Pappu replies : "Kyon ki woh dono topi pehanke chadte hain."
Teacher faints !!!!!!!
bhramos
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My dog sleeps about 20 hours a day.
He has his food prepared for him.
He can eat whenever he wants, 24/7/365.
His meals are provided at no cost to him.
He visits the Dr. once a year for his checkup, and again
during the year if any medical needs arise.
For this he pays nothing, and nothing is required of him.
He lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than he needs,
but he is not required to do any upkeep. If he makes a mess, someone else cleans it up.
He has his choice of luxurious places to sleep.
He receives these accommodations absolutely free.
He is living like a King, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever.
All of his costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day.
I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head.......
My dog is a POLITICIAN
He has his food prepared for him.
He can eat whenever he wants, 24/7/365.
His meals are provided at no cost to him.
He visits the Dr. once a year for his checkup, and again
during the year if any medical needs arise.
For this he pays nothing, and nothing is required of him.
He lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than he needs,
but he is not required to do any upkeep. If he makes a mess, someone else cleans it up.
He has his choice of luxurious places to sleep.
He receives these accommodations absolutely free.
He is living like a King, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever.
All of his costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day.
I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head.......
My dog is a POLITICIAN
bhramos
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Green tea effect!
A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue. . . . .
Doctor: "What happened?"
Woman:" Doctor, I don't know what to do Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp...."
Doctor:"I have a real good medicine against that: When your husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of green tea and start swirling it in your mouth. Don't drink it, just swirl it around and around".
.........2 weeks later she comes back to the doctor and looks reborn and fresh again.
Woman:" Doc, that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home drunk I gargled repeatedly with green tea and he never touched me."
Doctor:" You see how keeping your mouth shut is such a good idea !!!"
A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue. . . . .
Doctor: "What happened?"
Woman:" Doctor, I don't know what to do Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp...."
Doctor:"I have a real good medicine against that: When your husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of green tea and start swirling it in your mouth. Don't drink it, just swirl it around and around".
.........2 weeks later she comes back to the doctor and looks reborn and fresh again.
Woman:" Doc, that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home drunk I gargled repeatedly with green tea and he never touched me."
Doctor:" You see how keeping your mouth shut is such a good idea !!!"
bhramos
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(*Birth Date Calculator : Do it, its really Interesting....!!)
4 x Ur Birth Date
4 x Ur Birth Date
+ 13
x 25
- 200
+ Month u r born
x 2
- 40
x 50
+ last 2 digits of the Year u born
- 10500 = ??**
(Try it, it really Works)
:clap::clap: *Note : "All the Calculations should be done one by one, with pressing '=' after each step and then start the next step.." :clap::clap:
:clap::clap: **You get the Answer "??" = "Your Birth Date (DDMMYY)" :clap::clap:
:clap::clap: **You get the Answer "??" = "Your Birth Date (DDMMYY)" :clap::clap:
bhramos
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lol..............
hi germans learn English soon......
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Dhoni's Mom: Go and bring some vegetables from market.
Dhoni: But Mom, We defeated by South Africa, and public are in full anger.
Mom: Wear my sari and then go, no one will recognize you.
Dhoni goes to market wearing saree.
A Girl: Hi Dhoni, how are you?
Dhoni got shocked.
Dhoni: How did you know, I am Dhoni?
Girl: Abeh.. I am Nehra.
Dhoni: But Mom, We defeated by South Africa, and public are in full anger.
Mom: Wear my sari and then go, no one will recognize you.
Dhoni goes to market wearing saree.
A Girl: Hi Dhoni, how are you?
Dhoni got shocked.
Dhoni: How did you know, I am Dhoni?
Girl: Abeh.. I am Nehra.
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