Man arrested at LHC claims he's from the future

nrj

Ambassador
Joined
Nov 16, 2009
Messages
9,657
Likes
3,900
Country flag
A would-be saboteur arrested today at the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland made the bizarre claim that he was from the future. Eloi Cole, a strangely dressed young man, said that he had travelled back in time to prevent the LHC from destroying the world.

The LHC successfully collided particles at record force earlier this week, a milestone Mr Cole was attempting to disrupt by stopping supplies of Mountain Dew to the experiment's vending machines. He also claimed responsibility for the infamous baguette sabotage in November last year.

Mr Cole was seized by Swiss police after CERN security guards spotted him rooting around in bins. He explained that he was looking for fuel for his 'time machine power unit', a device that resembled a kitchen blender.

Police said Mr Cole, who was wearing a bow tie and rather too much tweed for his age, would not reveal his country of origin. "Countries do not exist where I am from. The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."

This isn't the first time time-travel has been blamed for mishaps at the LHC. Last year, the Japanese physicist Masao Ninomiya and Danish string-theory pioneer Holger Bech Nielsen put forward the hypothesis that the Higgs boson was so "abhorrent" that it somehow caused a ripple in time that prevented its own discovery.

Professor Brian Cox, a CERN physicist and full-time rock'n'roll TV scientist, was sympathetic to Mr Cole. "Bless him, he sounds harmless enough. At least he didn't mention bloody black holes."

Mr Cole was taken to a secure mental health facility in Geneva but later disappeared from his cell. Police are baffled, but not that bothered.

Man arrested at Large Hadron Collider claims he's from the future | CNET UK
 

nrj

Ambassador
Joined
Nov 16, 2009
Messages
9,657
Likes
3,900
Country flag
"Countries do not exist where I am from. The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."
:scared2::scared2::scared2:


He explained that he was looking for fuel for his 'time machine power unit', a device that resembled a kitchen blender.
:rotflmao:
 

Blackwater

Senior Member
Joined
Jan 9, 2012
Messages
21,158
Likes
12,172
Did he visited Pakistan the land of pure before these claims. pak is the only country which that technically advanced in the world:taunt::taunt::taunt:
 

utubekhiladi

The Preacher
Senior Member
Joined
Dec 3, 2010
Messages
4,758
Likes
10,224
Country flag
Mr Cole was taken to a secure mental health facility in Geneva but later disappeared from his cell. Police are baffled, but not that bothered.
:dude: how did he disappeared into thin air from his secure cell :dude:

may be he is telling the truth. may be he was rescued by his friends from the future using some kind of high tech device that bends time, space and matter. may be he was rescued by his friends who are in future by some kind of teleportation device .

even Einstein said that time traveling is absolutely possible. any thing is possible in future

:scared:

I am happy that the world didn't ended I.e we didn't nuked each other :confused:
 

nrj

Ambassador
Joined
Nov 16, 2009
Messages
9,657
Likes
3,900
Country flag
Mr Cole was attempting to disrupt by stopping supplies of Mountain Dew to the experiment's vending machines.
Damn he was arrested ! :(
 

The Messiah

Bow Before Me!
Senior Member
Joined
Aug 25, 2010
Messages
10,810
Likes
4,613
Travel more than speed of light and you will travel to the past.
 

mayfair

Senior Member
Joined
Feb 26, 2010
Messages
6,032
Likes
13,048
Is this satire?

The bloke seems to have seen 12 Monkeys, Dr. Who and Back to the Future trilogy one time too many.

Mr. Cole? Scraping around dustbins for fuel? Could have been more imaginative mate.

That said, would be fun to travel in time.
 
Last edited:

captonjohn

Regular Member
Joined
Oct 11, 2010
Messages
580
Likes
275
Country flag
:dude: how did he disappeared into thin air from his secure cell :dude:

may be he is telling the truth. may be he was rescued by his friends from the future using some kind of high tech device that bends time, space and matter. may be he was rescued by his friends who are in future by some kind of teleportation device .

even Einstein said that time traveling is absolutely possible. any thing is possible in future

:scared:

I am happy that the world didn't ended I.e we didn't nuked each other :confused:
Good point, I too have the same question. How did he got escaped from prison cell without harming anybody and without disturbing anything. May be this is their staff's mistake. Another question is that why someone would make such claim with no reason? Either he want instant fame or may be he is saying truth but can not be sure at this point.
 

pmaitra

Senior Member
Joined
Mar 10, 2009
Messages
33,267
Likes
19,508
"Ž"Eloi Cole, a strangely dressed young man," now that beggars the question, was he dressed like a Pokemon character or something more illustrious like ET?
 

Latest Replies

Global Defence

New threads

Articles

Top