Jokes Thread

[VIP]

 

[iNDiAN.96]

Facebook Wall of Dengue D'Souza, the mosquito that infected Ajmal Kasab

 

[Victor Sierra]

A lady visited a bar for the first time.

She sat on the table in front of the bartender.

A guy on her left ordered: "Jack Daniels, Single."

A guy on her right ordered: "Johnny Walker, Single."

Bartender looking at the lady: "And you mam?"

Lady replied: "Pushpa Patel, Married."

 

[Razor]

Start @ 0:20

 

[VIP]

 

[cloud_9]

 

[Rahul92]

 

[Rahul92]

 

[cobra commando]

 

[cobra commando]

 

[cobra commando]

 

[cobra commando]

 

[Daredevil]

 

[Daredevil]

The awkward moment when you forget to enlarge the other...

 

[Daredevil]

 

[Daredevil]

 

[Daredevil]

 

[Victor Sierra]

A Sniper goes into Arms & Ammo Store, to buy a new scope.
Manager takes out a scope & says: This is the best I have, you can see my house up that hill.

The Sniper looks through that scope & laughs. I see a naked man & woman in the house.

Manager looks in the scope & gives two bullets to the Sniper.

I will give you this scoper free if you shoot my wife's head off & the guy's dick off.

Sniper again looking through the scope says: Well seems like I can do that with just one shot.

 

[Neil]

Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It's a beautiful day and love is in the air.

Marie leans over to Pierre and says, 'Pierre, kiss me!'
Pierre grabs a bottle of Merlot and splashes it on Marie's lips.
'What are you doing, Pierre ?' says the startled Marie.
'I am Pierre, the French fighter pilot! When I have red meat, I have red wine!'
She smiles and they start kissing.

Things began to heat up a little and Marie says, 'Pierre, kiss me lower.'
Our hero tears her blouse open, grabs a bottle of Chardonnay and pours it on her breasts.
'Pierre! What are you doing now?' asks the bewildered Marie.
'I am Pierre, the French fighter pilot! When I have white meat, I have white wine!'
She giggles and they resume their passionate interlude: and things really steam up.

Marie leans close to his ear and whispers, 'Pierre, kiss me much lower!'
Pierre rips off her underwear, grabs a bottle of Cognac and pours it in her lap.
He then strikes a match and lights the cognac on fire.
Marie shrieks and dives into the River Seine.
Standing waist deep, Marie throws her arms into the air and screams furiously, 'PIERRE, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?'
Our 'hero' stands and says defiantly,

'I am Pierre, the French fighter pilot! If I go down, I go down in flames!'

 

[VIP]