Rahul Gandhi quits politics, Congress party splits

sasi

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Coverage of Rahul Gandhi’s 41st birthday function in 10, Janpath | The UnReal Times

Congress leaders jostled with each other in praising Rahul
10, Janpath wore a festivelook as Congress leaders, Ministers and party cadre called on Rahul Gandhi to wish him a very happy 41 st birthday. Rahul Baba, who is just back after a long vacation in some foreign country, was seated on a dais along with Priyanka, Robert, Sonia Gandhi, and Prime Minister Manmohan Singh.
Visitors were segregated into 2 queues – one for aam aadmi types and the other for Ministers, MPs and celebrities. Pranab da , who was among the first toarrive, handed over a boxof Mishti Doi to a beaming Rahul and proclaimed "It wash a privilege for me to sherve andarr Smt. Indira ji, Rajiv ji, and now Sonia ji. My ardent deshire eesh to sherve under Rahul ji before I become senile (sic)." There was a roar ofapproval and shouts of "Rahul Baba ki jai " reverberated across the precincts of 10 Janpath. A Congress worker was so overcome with emotion thathe squatted in front of Rahul and started shouting"I will not budge from this place until Rahul is made the PM". After a few minutes, he was curtly toldby another worker to "not over do it" and dragged away.
Much to the crowd's delight, Shah Rukh Khan, who was specially flown in for the occasion, made a dramatic appearance on the stage and delivered these filmi lines: " Mein to Parde ka hero hoon lekin Rahul Baba desh ka asli hero hai " to the crowd's applause. He then enacted a scene from his upcoming movie, Ra.One, by contorting his body and sporting grotesque facial expressions. Priyanka, who was rather bored till then, clapped enthusiastically at SRK's cameo and exhorted the crowd to watch Ra.One without fail.
Mani Shankar Aiyer, next in line, sweetly wished Rahul a very happy birthday and then barked at a rather taken aback Manmohan, "Remember, Rahul is the prince and Madam the dowager queen;You, Sir, are merely a regent serving at their pleasure. Aukaad mein rahiye! " Sonia Gandhi shot a stern glance at Mani as ifto say "don't heckle Manmohan ji".
Another Minister gushed "Rahul ji is like a God to this Government. He may not say much in Parliament or Working Committee and cabinet meetings, but his mere presence and beatificsmile is reassuring and fills us humble Ministers with hope and vigor." Minister for Sports and Youth Affairs, Ajay Maken,facilitated Rahul by saying "Rahul ji is a youth icon and a beacon of hope for youngsters. I propose thathis birthday be celebrated as National Youth Day justas Chacha Nehru's birthday is celebrated as Children's Day."
The assembled workers then started pumping their fists and chanting, " Hamarimaang poori karo, Rahul Gandhi ko PM banao, " and the shouting soon reacheda crescendo. Prime MinisterManmohan Singh, initially uncertain about how to react, also joined in the sloganeering rather animatedly. Rahul got up topacify the crowd and said, " Shaant ho jaiye . Don't worry, I will take over soon, when the appropriate time comes, bepatient. For now, I am focused on fighting for the aam aadmi ."
The Prime Minister then got up to address the crowd. Appearing statesmen like, the Prime Minister said in a measured tone "My Government is fortunate tobe lead by the Gandhi family. Rahul ji is like"¦" Sonia began to doze off and Rahul, by now tired with all the adulation, began to yawn. The crowd rapidly began to disperse sensing that the function was about to end. Manmohan quickly mumbledhis remaining lines and satdown. Madam's political secretary then announced that the function had ended and asked everyone to quickly vacate the premises since Rahul Baba had to rest.
 

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Rahul Gandhi's political stunt invites film, product endorsement offers | The UnReal Times

Rahul may replace Abhishek Bachchan in Dhoom 3
Rahul Gandhi's daring nocturnal pillion ride, dream arrest and release have not only captured theimagination of the masses,but has also endeared him to film producers and ad agencies.Companies and film producers are now making a beeline to leverage Brand Rahul
Hero Honda has approached Rahul to endorse their bikes."Rahul now stands for values that are closely associatedwith Hero Honda's brand positioning – daredevilry, large heartedness, and zeal. We have therefore asked him to be Hero Honda's new celebrity endorser" said a company spokesman.
Uncorroborated reports reveal that the Tata groupwants him to endorse the Nano – the ultimate aam aadmi car. Amul has been knocking at his doors for along time.

Rahul may soon be snatching caps from toofans on a Hero Honda Karizma
Yash Chopra is willing to dump Abhishek Bachchan and Uday Chopra for RahulGandhi and his sidekick Digvijaya Singh for Dhoom 3. The Congress has not warmed to this proposal. "Rahul is the Congress' mascot. Sharing him with other corporations may lead to brand dilution unless these guys are willing to agree to joint product placement. "
 

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After assuming responsibilities as the Vice President of the Indian National Congress, yuvraj Rahul Gandhi announced his first major intervention: the Nehru-Gandhi scion will tour the length and breadth of the country as the anchor of the weekly NDTV street-food program'Zaika India Ka'. The show was previously hosted by Vinod Dua in which he sampled local cuisine from different parts of the country.
Explaining the rationale behind his move, Rahul said, "With my elevation, it's imperative that I raise my learning curve about India. Then one day, I saw this show 'Zaiqa India ka' and I immediately realized the learning opportunity it offered for me. Replacing Vinod Dua was no big deal,as NDTV is as much ally ofours as it NCP, DMK and CBI. But what lured me mostwas the concept of this show. I have always loved travelling and eating at a Dalit's home, but with show, I can do it officially. This is my best move before the next Lok Sabhapolls."
The Congress VP citing thefollowing reasons for his choice of the show in a selfwritten note"
1. It has free food. Yippeee.
2. I will get to travel in different parts of India, Yippeee Yeyeye
3. I will be on television, but it will play out according to a script. The editing team headed by Diggy uncle will ensure nothing unwarranted is aired.
4. Even if something goes wrong and the show doesn't take off well, I can replace myself with Manmohan uncle and blamehim for the failure.
Digvijay Singh has lauded the initiative and termed it as a strong answer to 'BJP's rath yatras '. "The Congress has always beenwith the aam aadmi , and Rahul baba will ensure he is sharing the food along with the joys and sorrows of the common man. In fact,letting Rahulji eat freely anywhere anytime in India is one of the most fundamental principles behind the Food Security Act due to pass in next Parliament session," said the veteran leader.
Considered as the mastermind behind this plan of Rahul Gandhi, Digvijay Singh continued, "Well, he will start his tourwith an Italian restaurant in Banglore. Karnataka is anyways easy place for usnow to begin with. Then, we will ensure that he visits all those places which we are sure to win inthe next LS polls." With a slight cough, he added, "Gujarat is not on the cards since Rahul baba doesn't like Gujarati cuisine."The move has raised the hackles of opposition leaders. An envious Nitin Gadkari said, "Damn! Why didn't the idea strike me while I was the BJP President? I will beseech the RSS to give me one more chance for the sake of this show. Please PleasePlease." An irate Mamata Banerjee screamed, "I do not know phor bhat reasons, but he should totolly roll back."
Rahul Gandhi to replace Vinod Dua in cuisine show Zaika India Ka | The UnReal Times
 

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