Is marriage a trap for men?

[Yusuf]

If the couple are true to each other then laws are irrelevant. In the case of India, the couple made marriages work. Actually in the case of India, women get into a shithole of a marriage with the cultural issues of saas bahu saaga, dowry seeking husband who will torture and then beats his wife and the wife in spite of all this tries to make the marriage work in hope of things improving.

 

[Known_Unknown]

How is your proposition any different than current common law families?

Anyways, Marriage is only a trap if you don't respect the virtue of it and get married for the wrong reasons. If you value your wealth, get a prenup. If you don't want to pay child-support, use the appropriate birth control.

Prenups arent' worth the paper they're written on. In Canada, prenups are routinely thrown out, because though the system in the US if fcked up, in Canada it's a whole other level of fckedupness. I've studied the case law regarding separation laws in Canada and it's much much more one-sided than possibly anywhere wlese in the world besides other socialist "paradises" like Scandanavia. In one case, a couple divorced, where the man made $20k a year and the wife made $21k a year. After a 50% split in assets, the man ended up paying alimony of over half his net income to his wife indefinitely.

If you have the courage, here's something to read about which throws light on the legal situation in Canada:

Gender Bias in the Family Courts of Canada: Fact or Fantasy? | Gene C. Colman Family Law Centre | Toronto, Ontario

http://www.complexfamilylaw.com/Art...erging-Trends-in-Spousal-Support-Part-I.shtml

 

[Known_Unknown]

If the couple are true to each other then laws are irrelevant. In the case of India, the couple made marriages work. Actually in the case of India, women get into a shithole of a marriage with the cultural issues of saas bahu saaga, dowry seeking husband who will torture and then beats his wife and the wife in spite of all this tries to make the marriage work in hope of things improving.

I believe you're just going along with old stereotypes. While what you say might be true of rural India or even the lower middle classes in the cities, in most of the middle and upper classes, the wives are fairly empowered, working women who in many instances even abuse the dowry laws to throw their husbands and in-laws in jail when they don't get along with them.

Also, you would be surprised at divorce rates in India. A quick search on the popular website bharatmatrimony yields legions of divorced men and women between 40-50 years of age looking to re-marry. In come cases, there are more 40-50 year olds than 20-30 year olds from some communities!

 

[warriorextreme]

yes it is trap for men, I think after few decades concept of marriage will be outdated and people will just choose live-in relationship..

 

[Yusuf]

I believe you're just going along with old stereotypes. While what you say might be true of rural India or even the lower middle classes in the cities, in most of the middle and upper classes, the wives are fairly empowered, working women who in many instances even abuse the dowry laws to throw their husbands and in-laws in jail when they don't get along with them.

Also, you would be surprised at divorce rates in India. A quick search on the popular website bharatmatrimony yields legions of divorced men and women between 40-50 years of age looking to re-marry. In come cases, there are more 40-50 year olds than 20-30 year olds from some communities!

Further research will reveal that all the past cultural are very much ingrained in upper class urban class. Did you watch any episode of Satyamev Jayate?

 

[Mad Indian]

Non sense. Its a trap for women to prevent her from having other men's child

 

[Ray]

Marriage is a trap for those who feel trapped as it is with life.

Life is a challenge.

Nothing is perfect.

One must learn to make it success by taking on the challenges.

Marriage is one of the more pleasant challenges of life.

 

[Ray]

I believe you're just going along with old stereotypes. While what you say might be true of rural India or even the lower middle classes in the cities, in most of the middle and upper classes, the wives are fairly empowered, working women who in many instances even abuse the dowry laws to throw their husbands and in-laws in jail when they don't get along with them.

Also, you would be surprised at divorce rates in India. A quick search on the popular website bharatmatrimony yields legions of divorced men and women between 40-50 years of age looking to re-marry. In come cases, there are more 40-50 year olds than 20-30 year olds from some communities!

I would not go by matrimonial ads to take a catch all view on the rationale for divorces.

There are many reasons for divorces.

However, one of the major reasons is that the joint family system is no longer prevalent, wherein chores that would have been distributed now has to be managed by the unitary family and that adds to the stress, more so, since the trend is to be a double income family and both are tired after work to take on the domestic responsibilities.

As both have to leave for work at the same time, they can only rely on part time help, who herself (part time help) is in a hurry to go to the next place of work. The result is a slapdash effort by the part time help occurs, where the wife and husband are not satisified with either the quality of food prepared or the house cleaning. This adds to stress and blaming each other for not taking interest and so on.

Then there is the childrens' education to be looked into. Further, taking them to the various co curricular activities and so on.

In short, the time management is rushed. This leads to great stress.

And by the time the family sertles down as a family, there is hardly any time, for what is quaintly stated as 'quality time'.

It is only now that you hear of phrase as 'quality time' and ' we, as a family eat, at least, one meal together'!!

In the olden days, there was nothing like quality time since it was quality time all the time and the family always ate together!

 

[Tronic]

Marriage is a trap for those who feel trapped as it is with life.

Life is a challenge.

Nothing is perfect.

One must learn to make it success by taking on the challenges.

Marriage is one of the more pleasant challenges of life.

Wow.

Very well put sir!



***********
Thanks

Ray

 

[Mad Indian]

Marriage is a trap for those who feel trapped as it is with life.

Life is a challenge.

Nothing is perfect.

One must learn to make it success by taking on the challenges.

Marriage is one of the more pleasant challenges of life.

Actually Marriage is quite artificial creation by man to enslave woman. But now they are so entrapped by the creation which was created to make them slaves so much so that, they are the ones wanting to get married.

But there is a strong link between marriage and evolution though. I would say, marriage/family set up has helped the evolution process and has taken evolution to the next level

 

[Mad Indian]

Why anonymous poll? Whats the harm in a public poll??

 

[Tolaha]

I am married for a little more than 4 years and like one Chinese leader said, my response to the OP is:
"Its too early to tell".

Give me a few more years and I maybe able to answer this question.

 

[sesha_maruthi27]

During the 60's RADIO was given as dowry to the JAMATHA...........

During the 70's Television sets were making an entrance into the INDIAN MARKET and TV's were given as dowry for the JAMATHA..........

During the 80's and 90's motor bikes were given as a part of the dowry for the JAMATHA.........

Now a days the JAMATHA or the BOY and his family are asking for a girl who has no BOY FRIENDS and a pre-marital relationships............

THIS IS THE STATE OF MARRIAGE IN INDIA AT PRESENT..........

NOW A DAYS IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO GET A GIRL WHO HAS NO PREMARITAL RELATIONSHIP WITH THE BOYS AND ALSO IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO GET A VIRGIN GIRL. I MEAN TO SAY " A GIRL WHO IS PURE IN HER THOUGHT, WORD AND DEED"...........

 

[Mad Indian]

I am married for a little more than 4 years and like one Chinese leader said, my response to the OP is:
"Its too early to tell".

Give me a few more years and I maybe able to answer this question.

As I said, we should ask the women first

 

[nrj]

Life is a trap itself

 

[Mad Indian]

During the 60's RADIO was given as dowry to the JAMATHA...........

During the 70's Television sets were making an entrance into the INDIAN MARKET and TV's were given as dowry for the JAMATHA..........

During the 80's and 90's motor bikes were given as a part of the dowry for the JAMATHA.........

Now a days the JAMATHA or the BOY and his family are asking for a girl who has no BOY FRIENDS and a pre-marital relationships............

THIS IS THE STATE OF MARRIAGE IN INDIA AT PRESENT..........

NOW A DAYS IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO GET A GIRL WHO HAS NO PREMARITAL RELATIONSHIP WITH THE BOYS AND ALSO IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO GET A VIRGIN GIRL. I MEAN TO SAY " A GIRL WHO IS PURE IN HER THOUGHT, WORD AND DEED"...........

Seriously? WTF????


Are the women having sex with themselves?

After all they are having sex with men. So by that extension, it means that Men are not "pure" or "virgin" either

I look forward to the day when India becomes a true Libertarian society

 

[nrj]

NOW A DAYS IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO GET A GIRL WHO HAS NO PREMARITAL RELATIONSHIP WITH THE BOYS AND ALSO IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO GET A VIRGIN GIRL. I MEAN TO SAY " A GIRL WHO IS PURE IN HER THOUGHT, WORD AND DEED"...........

Oh boy...

My sympathies for the lucky girl

 

[p2prada]

NOW A DAYS IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO GET A GIRL WHO HAS NO PREMARITAL RELATIONSHIP WITH THE BOYS AND ALSO IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO GET A VIRGIN GIRL. I MEAN TO SAY " A GIRL WHO IS PURE IN HER THOUGHT, WORD AND DEED"...........

 

[sesha_maruthi27]

Seriously? WTF????


Are the women having sex with themselves?

After all they are having sex with men. So by that extension, it means that Men are not "pure" or "virgin" either

I look forward to the day when India becomes a true Libertarian society

Now tell me how many of you don't expect to marry a girl who is a virgin..............

There are some boys who are VIRGINS and who have not touched a girl in their life. Take me, I have not touched any girl and I have not had sex with anyone and I don't like to have sex before marriage. I am true to my heart and all my friends, both girls and boys know that I true when I say that I am a VIRGIN............

 

[Adux]

Baal Brahmachari means bachelor for life. Why buy the cow when you'te getting the milk for free?

As for the settlement after divorce, it's not 50% of the "man's property", but 50% of all property and debt. So if the man owns 80% of the property and carries 20% of debt, after divorce, he will lose much more in net terms.

Also, the worst part is not the property settlement, but the alimony payments. Men are usually required to pay alimony to their former wives for life, and the payments are calculated as being up to 70% of the man's gross salary, which in many cases is more than his take home pay.

So you are of Indian Orgin and You are a german nationalist with Adolf Hitler as avatar. I wonder what Hitler would with you, if you were around in the same time? Where is the SS?