Movie review--Azaan

Discussion in 'Members Corner' started by ashdoc, Oct 16, 2011.

  1. ashdoc

    ashdoc Senior Member Senior Member

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    AZAAAAAAN.....at least to a politically incorrect person like me this muslim call for prayer to the devout sounds like a terrible call for jehad that reverberates across the ages......

    Images of gun-toting men attacking my hometown Mumbai or planting bombs elsewhere and masked terrorists creating mayhem in kashmir or chechenya flash through my mind......

    Thats what I went to the movie for--to see the heady cocktail of islam , Kalashnikovs , violence and terrorism.....

    But lo.....Azaan Khan is actually the name of a RAW agent , a MUSALMAN DESHBHAKT.....:clap::clap:

    And what is the task set before this musalman deshbhakt ??

    It is to save the country from biological warfare--a deadly strain of the ebola virus that China has spread across the country to kill people in millions.....

    And to do that he has to go get a girl in Morrocco whose blood has been inoculated by Dr Maifooz ( another musalman deshbhakt :clap::clap: ) against the virus before he was killed by the anti-national forces . Replicating her antibodies in laboratories will give India the cure to the Ebola infection .

    But to get to her and save his country Mr Azaan Khan will have to fight against the agents of those who want to destroy India--dangerous mean people who have high tech weapons , and whom Azaan has to counter with brains and brawn.....

    .....And counter them he does.....

    In the bhojpuri accented english of his RAW handler (actor Ravi Kissan )--He faaught like a lian against aaal aaads :D

    But while countering them he has to fight against turncoats from his own RAW agency who are working for the enemy , and against his own younger brother Aman Khan the musalman deshdrohi.....

    But one word about this maha musalman deshbhakt......why was such a wooden , expressionless actor chosen for this lead role ?? For he is an actor who is not able to show any emotion even when his mehbooba ( some firangi actress ) dies in his arms , ending a brief and tragic romance.....
    What hold does he have in the film industry that he was chosen inspite of his obvious incapacity to act ??

    The fight sequences are the only somewhat interesting part of the film , but even they are mitigated by the hero's ( Sachin Joshi ) expressionless acting......

    In the end the hero saves the country at the cost of his life.....and I really wish he's dead so that I dont have to see him in more films in the future....:D

    As far as YOU are concerned......you dont have to see him in this film too....

    ......For I am not recommending it to you.....

    Verdict--not good.....
     
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  3. Bangalorean

    Bangalorean Stars and Ambassadors Stars and Ambassadors

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    ^^ Is this a true review, or is this a spoof? :confused:
     
  4. ashdoc

    ashdoc Senior Member Senior Member

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    i have given my opinion of the film--in my politically incorrect style .
     
  5. Param

    Param Senior Member Senior Member

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    I would rather watch MI2 once again.
     
  6. Sabir

    Sabir DFI TEAM Senior Member

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    Bollywood is not yet prepared for spy movie. A spy movie shoul be a spy movie...conspiracy,counter conspiracy, ruthlessness..................flavour of patriotism, romance etc just weaken the movie............And of course, there is no story available............
     
  7. Param

    Param Senior Member Senior Member

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    Bollywood and the rest of Indian film industry should stick to pure Masala movies where they excel.Copying Hollywood spy movies, science fiction etc is a waste of time.
     
  8. Yusuf

    Yusuf GUARDIAN Administrator

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    You can write your reviews but that capitalized musalman deshbhakt with the clap was an obvious mock by you as if you are the only thekedar of deshbakhti
     
  9. ashdoc

    ashdoc Senior Member Senior Member

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    actually , actor ravi kissan , azaan's RAW handler , shouts unnecessarily and loudly several times in the film, calling ( or rather shouting ) azaan a musalman deshbhakt . thats what gave me the idea of writing musalman deshbhakt in capital letters--for writing in capital letters on the internet is equivalent to shouting .

    and clapping was a mock at bollywoods's oh-so-obvious appeasement of showing a ' good muslim ' doing patriotic things in practically every film .

    actually i was only trying to add some fun element to the review . not meant to hurt any community's feelings .

    the mocking tone is also because the film is so shitty.....and especially shitty is the acting of actor ( or nonactor ?? )sachin joshi , who plays azaan .

    now i have learnt that sachin joshi is the son of the owner of goa gutkha , and the owner financed the film in order to launch his son .

    i should have really avoided the film , but the ( paid ? ) reviewer of TOI said the action in the film was good , so i went to see the film .

    having wasted my money and time on a useless film , i was trying to make the best of the situation by writing a funny review .
     
    Last edited: Oct 16, 2011

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