Is cultural gap a hindrance to long term relationship

Discussion in 'Politics & Society' started by Yusuf, Jul 14, 2011.

  1. Yusuf

    Yusuf GUARDIAN Administrator

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2009
    Messages:
    24,274
    Likes Received:
    11,287
    Location:
    BANGalore
    Well some may find it a strange question but I am asking this because this is a reality.

    A friend of mine, a Marwari has had two failed relationships. The first was with a Malayali which broke just a couple of months before marriage and the second was with a Telugu which ended in a divorce just last week.

    Among other reasons, I feel the cultural gap between a Marwari and someone from down south was probably a big hindrance, particularly at home with parents who probably are not open to an idea of their son marrying a "madarasi".

    What do you guys think?
     
  2.  
  3. Dark_Prince

    Dark_Prince Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2010
    Messages:
    374
    Likes Received:
    79
    Yes it is, however there are cases of cross cultural success stories!!

    P.S: These days with all the freedom to women, they had gone astray with their new found "fem-dome" (where they undue advantage of their freedom); if you can get a carrying, loving, understanding, decent women - hang on to her irrespective of the culture/caste/creed/religion, as this breed of women would soon get extinct in India and we will be (left in India) with "Slut walkers" or "Illiterate Dehati" women! (In the west we may find desirable women, however not in India)
     
  4. Yusuf

    Yusuf GUARDIAN Administrator

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2009
    Messages:
    24,274
    Likes Received:
    11,287
    Location:
    BANGalore
    Well all that love shove quickly goes away I think. My friend was with that girl for 3-4 years before they married. Their marriage broke down within 6 months. They kept trying to save it for a year more and then decided to part ways. I may be reading more than what it might be, but I kinda felt it could be the difference in culture.
     
  5. GPM

    GPM Tihar Jail Banned

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2011
    Messages:
    1,510
    Likes Received:
    506
    That 3-4 years killed the marriage. Marriage needs adjustments, which are not needed for live in. That woman shall never have a stable marriage. By 40-45 years, she would disillusioned, companionless and sad. Who will look at her at that that age, except a husband of long standing?

    Remember. Marriage is much more than sex only, while live in has little beyond sex.
     
    Last edited: Jul 14, 2011
    Godless-Kafir likes this.
  6. Yusuf

    Yusuf GUARDIAN Administrator

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2009
    Messages:
    24,274
    Likes Received:
    11,287
    Location:
    BANGalore
    They didn't live in for those years. But in a relationship.
     
  7. GPM

    GPM Tihar Jail Banned

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2011
    Messages:
    1,510
    Likes Received:
    506
    Call it whatever pompous name you give, it was not a marriage, was it?

    Cultural gap? Yes. There was such wide gap between them and their culture.
     
  8. Virendra

    Virendra Moderator Moderator

    Joined:
    Oct 16, 2010
    Messages:
    4,674
    Likes Received:
    2,923
    Location:
    Delhi, India, India
    I've never been into long ones, hell not even short :D but let me guess.
    I would be difficult at least as the two would have to be cautious of each other's sensitivities (extra ones because of the gap) and would have to consistently work around them.
    But with these efforts a very determined and balanced couple can make it as good as anything else.
     
  9. GPM

    GPM Tihar Jail Banned

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2011
    Messages:
    1,510
    Likes Received:
    506
    Who was the KEEP and who was the keeper?
     
  10. civfanatic

    civfanatic Retired Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2009
    Messages:
    4,562
    Likes Received:
    2,526
    Location:
    తెలంగాణ
    Lol, Telugu women are vicious to their own kind. I can't imagine how they would treat a Northie.
     
  11. KS

    KS Bye bye DFI Veteran Member

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2010
    Messages:
    8,008
    Likes Received:
    5,718
    Location:
    irrelevant
    Hey dont talk like that. All the Gulte girls who studied in my class were so homely and so quiet. :D
     
  12. Yusuf

    Yusuf GUARDIAN Administrator

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2009
    Messages:
    24,274
    Likes Received:
    11,287
    Location:
    BANGalore
    Looks like a cultural gap between telugus too!!
     
  13. Phenom

    Phenom Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 6, 2010
    Messages:
    878
    Likes Received:
    401
    Rate of marriage failures are increasing at an ever increasing rate.

    Cultural difference could be one extra reason, but marriage with cultural and caste similarities are also failing. India is getting westernized and in the metros we may find the 'live-in' relationship became more prominent than marriages in the coming decades.
     
  14. Tronic

    Tronic Stars and Ambassadors Stars and Ambassadors

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2009
    Messages:
    1,915
    Likes Received:
    1,275
    Yes, it very well can be. I see a very similar issue with my partner, though we are not yet married. We bear each other's differences, but I know this is only possible till the day we have to live with each other 24/7. I guess its all about both partners willing to change themselves and making room and acceptance for each other's culture. Harder done than said though.
     
  15. GPM

    GPM Tihar Jail Banned

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2011
    Messages:
    1,510
    Likes Received:
    506
    In live ins, there hardly any need to change. But in marriage a lots of adjustments have to be made.
     

Share This Page